I got the call this morning, and I knew what I would hear on the other end when read the caller id
And when I called my sister at work, I didn't need to say anything
We were both expecting the call
A mix of anticipation, relief, and despair

I chose not to process the news until the end of the day
staring at purple sneakers
riding a bus on an infinite loop to nowhere
tears rolling down my cheeks
eyes hidden by my ridiculously large sunglasses
wishing the world would stop
just for a moment

my grandmother has been at her side
saying goodbye
and this morning as she called
she noted that she had known her the longest of all,
carried her home from the hospital
and my grandmother has outlived both her siblings
and it breaks my heart to think of her watching her baby sister slip away

i can't imagine how that feels
i hope i never have to know

and we are all so devastated that she is gone
but (glad) she is no longer suffering
but now it is we who carry the burden of sadness

three loved ones
lost to cancer
in twice as many months
two taken much before their time

I still wear my "share the care" band
though it confuses me
and I wish that I would have made that call
and am so glad I sent that card
that simply read
I love you
for there was nothing else to say

and I just can't process any of it
I am so glad they made the wedding
and i regret not spending more time with her when she was there

how could we have known
the time would be so short
she was always so optimistic
and so very strong

I am so glad this wonderful woman was my aunt
my friend
I am so thankful for our time together

it's people that make this world go 'round
for without the love
there are just days
and things
and life is a long time to live
without love

In years, Jill, your life was too short
but in love
what was given and received
it was a very full life


I love you
you will be greatly missed